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Henry looked down at the now unconscious form of Stacy and Bruce with a triumphant smirk plastered all over his face through the valley of his dark brown cleavage, watching the massive red welts of his two knockout blows beginning to spread across their faces. ‘Serves you right for trying to get in the way of all the fun, dick,’ he thought, and mentally spat at the formerly hulking boyfriend of the person he’d bodynapped. He had no real inkling as to why the frat boy had decided to help him like he had, but he had to admit he was thankful for the knuckle dragger’s intervention. It’d certainly put him back in his good graces after the stunt he’d pulled with his friends and their round of shots.

After a few moments of appreciating in Stacy’s striking form, Henry rolled his shoulders, sucked in a deep breath, and jumped off the pair. Just his luck that he’d come closer to being intimate with two women than he'd ever been before that night and one had completely collapsed while the other was sitting discarded a few feet away from where he was, glaring daggers into him from her lowly vantage point on the floor.

“Y-you bastard!” Elise’s disembodied head said with a snarl. “When Bruce comes to, I swear to God, you’re going to pay for what you did to him and Stace!”

“Oh, yeah, I’m sure. How’d that work out for him just a minute ago?” Henry said, rolling his eyes as he sauntered over and stared down at his body’s former owner, arms sitting akimbo on his pronounced hips.

“When he gets his body back-”

“That’s a matter of if, isn’t it?” Henry responded acidly, glancing over at the ringleader frat boy doing some more ridiculous poses in front of his friends like some exaggerated superhero, their alcohol-induced euphoria causing them to yuck it up at his antics. One of them had practically fallen onto the other one he was laughing so hard his baseball cap askew.

Elise’s lip trembled and for a moment Henry thought she was about to cry. Whatever. She’d gotten herself into this mess tonight and he had no interest in helping her to get out of it. Everyone knew she was one of the biggest attention whores on campus; hell, the possibility of her embarrassing herself or doing something salacious was half the reason he knew that Sam had even invited her to the party in the first place.

“Besides, what do you think he’ll say if I were to tell him you’re even in this mess to begin with because you were eating yourself out? I mean, I think a lot of us suspected you were a narcissist, yet I’m not sure anyone would’ve expected you to go that far. Man, wish I’d thought to record it on my phone or take a picture, but you know how much of a pain in the ass it is to move with your own head cut off,” Henry said with a dismissive wave of his finely manicured hand.

“I- I need-“

“Ugh, don’t get your panties in a twist… well, I guess they’d be mine, if I were wearing them. Anyway, you’ll get it back sooner or later. Don’t flatter yourself; this isn’t a permanent thing. Last thing I’d want to be caught dead in is some chick’s body while she’s on the rag, no matter how smokin’ she is.”

The sorority sister’s mouth opened to protest further, but Henry had had enough, and turned around to begin walking away to go mingle with the other guests again. The small crowd that had gathered earlier to see the ‘catfight’ between him, Bruce, and Stacy had apparently lost interest once the novelty wore off as there were only a few people absentmindedly milling around the perimeter of the large living room now. ‘Weird,’ Henry thought to himself. ‘Guess it really is easier to adapt to life-altering events once it becomes somewhat normalized.’

Of course, none of what he’d been experimenting with had occurred to any of them just yet, and the night was still young. Henry was sure that the most exciting things were yet to come and that there were going to be many people tomorrow morning attempting to find owners of differing body parts while nursing even worse hangovers than they’d ever before thought possible.

“Yo, Henry!”

Immediately, his thoughts scattered as he turned his head to face the lead frat boy staring down at him with an approving grin, his head nestled on Bruce’s shoulders. ‘Jesus, I forgot just how small Elise is,’ Henry thought, craning his neck up to look at the other man.

“That was wild shit, man. Well done. I don’t think any of us thought ya had it in ya.”

“I was in your corner,” said one of the three, the one who’d nearly lost his hat earlier from laughing too hard. His cheeks were a cherry red, eyes still watery from his earlier guffawing. The third of the trio, and the shortest of them all, sporting a blond crew cut grumbled as he reached into his cargo pants pocket and shoved a bill into a palm that Baseball Cap had outstretched towards him.

“Just a friendly little wager on who we thought would pull ahead,” the guy said with a shrug of his massive shoulders. “Nothin’ personal.”

“Uh… well, you did help weigh the scales,” Henry said non-committal as he could manage. He really did nearly piss himself when Bruce Preston stormed into the room to try to get things back under control at Elise’s behest. “Thanks for that.”

“Nah, you were right. Where’s the fun in having it all end early, you know? Plus, gotta respect anyone who’s ballsy enough to take one of the hottest chicks on campus’ goods even if you don’t have those right now.” A flush came over Henry’s face at the words, causing him to run a hand over his rough, irregular stubble.

“Yeah,” he said, oddly flustered. “Yeah, right?” he gestured down at himself, then back at his newfound friend, clearing his head of the odd, pleasant warmth that had briefly come over him. “No need for half measures. You get an opportunity like this, and you gun for the best.”

“See?” the frat boy said with a loud laugh, gesturing at Henry again to his two cohorts. “He gets it. Up top,” he said, raising an arm up. Normally, these were the kinds of people who Henry would never have thought in a million years to chat up but swapping made for strange bedfellows it seemed. Awkwardly, Henry leapt up towards the massive palm of Bruce’s stolen hand, but only ended up hitting the guy on his elbow and a moment later he almost tripped over himself once he landed back on earth.

“Can’t say I don’t miss being taller,” Henry murmured, giving what he hoped was an authentic sounding laugh as he tried not to wince in pain as the vibration reverberated up his much smaller legs and into his knees. He felt every inch of his new form tremble at the motion too, breasts and butt jiggling. God, it all felt so amazing. How could women deal with being like this all the time?

“Jared, bro, pass me the sword,” said Crew Cut, as he gestured to the miracle in Baseball Cap’s hand.

“Owen, this is gonna be some fuckin’ stupid shit…” Jared muttered, reluctantly letting the metal hilt pass from himself to his fellow frat member.

“C’mon, I promise it won’t take long! I’ve wanted to do this since I was a kid.”

Raising an eyebrow, Henry looked over quizzically at the towering jock above him, who just shrugged.

“You’re wasted, ya damn lightweight. Want me to do it for you?”

“Fuck off!” Owen said with a scowl. “You were makin’ fun of me a few minutes ago for it.”

“’Cause you could be doin’ way cooler shit with it than what you’re about to. Let’s go find some babes and put butterfaces on some real dime pieces. We do that and they’re ours.”

Like a spoiled child who’d just been told he couldn’t have an ice cream cone, Owen dropped to the floor, his unsteady movement causing him to briefly look as if he were going to hurl before he caught himself and spared everyone around him the indignity of cleaning up his sick. Henry watched as the college student began to undo his shoelaces, then yank off their accompanying shoes, and finally his socks before he flicked the button on the contraption, the scientific marvel giving a brief ‘whoosh’ as it sprung to life, its bright, neon blue light arcing through the air. Then, with a carefulness that he had to admit shocked him, Henry watched Owen slice into his own flesh and part the foot from the rest of his leg. Then, a moment later, its mate followed it. The wounds left behind left a strange, effervescent glow that Henry was all too familiar with as he watched Owen examine himself before he looked up sheepishly at all of them.

“Okay… maybe I am a dumbass. I need help with this.”

Jared, already moving towards his friend, shook his head, several admonitions being muttered under his breath as he yanked the light saber away.

“Figured out you needed someone else to do this part, huh? Better sooner rather than later.”

Walking over beside Owen, the drunk raised his hands as Jared raised the blade like a katana, swiftly bringing them down on his hands, and letting them drop into the pile of limbs growing underneath him.

“Dude… was it like that for you, Clyde?” Owen asked Bruce’s body’s current pilot.

“Yeah, you get used to it pretty quick, though; it goes away once you get reattached.”

“Alright,” Owen said with a nod to Jared. “I’m ready, dude. Let’s get this party started.” Henry watched as Jared reached down, grabbed Owen’s discarded arms and popped them where his feet should’ve been, and then took his feet and connected them at his wrists.

“Woah! Holy shit! It feels so real…” All ten fingers and toes were wiggled in places that nature had obviously not intended, and Henry had to resist the urge to roll his eyes in sympathy as Jared looked down and shook his head, running a hand through his blond hair.

“It is real, you goddamn idiot.”

“Look, man, I’ve always wondered what it’d be like to put your hands where your feet are, and then your feet where your hands are.”

“Owen, you’re probably gonna fall right the fuck over once you stand up,” Clyde said, and Henry could tell he was resisting the urge to laugh.

“Worth it, worth it. If I get the hang of it, do you think someone’ll let me take their hands? That way, I could know what it’s like to be a chimp.”

‘If you find someone whose IQ is about that level, maybe,’ Henry thought to himself.

“Uh-huh. No way I am wasting any more time sitting here with all you fuckers,” Jared said, gesturing with Sam Smegly’s invention. “I’m takin’ this with me and I’m gonna go mingle like I should’ve done fifteen minutes ago. You comin’, Clyde?”

“…Shouldn’t someone stay here and watch Owen?” Clyde said, pointing down at the now squirming Owen as he tried to push himself upwards into a standing position.

“You wanna babysit him? Be my guest.”

Without waiting for a response, the remaining trio watched Jared quickly make a break from them out into the other crowds that were giving them stares, mostly at Owen as he flailed like a beached fish and at Henry’s still nude form and ill-fitting head.

“Do you even think you can move?” Clyde said, gesturing down at Owen.

“Look, just gimme a minute and I’ll get the hang of this, I promise.”

The soles of Owen’s feet pressed against the floor, the muscles twitching underneath the skin, as he used them to leverage himself upwards. Whether due to his drunkenness or the fact that he now had to press his palms against the smooth tile of Smegly’s parents’ home, Owen took a few unsteady, lurching steps forward as he turned to face Henry and Clyde.

“Feeling the floor is so weird…” Owen complained with a frown, glancing down at the offending digits below him as he swayed in place, feet angled towards his knees.

“Buyer’s remorse?” Henry asked with a cheeky grin.

“Whatever, ass wipe. Least I can normally get into a chick’s pants without havin’ to steal ‘em.”

“Pretty sure you weren’t complaining a few minutes ago when I let you put salt all over me.”

“Who do you think put the cover over your ugly mug?”

“Owen, ease up. We’re all havin’ fun here tonight,” Clyde responded, butting in, and shooting Henry an apologetic look.

“Yeah, whatever. Look, I’m gonna go see if there’s anyone out there who wants things to get even more wild tonight. Come find me once you’re done with your ‘girl’friend there.”

Spinning around, Owen began to make his way in the opposite direction of Jared, the slapping of his rearranged body parts oddly sounding in time with whatever techno beat was thrumming throughout the house’s walls.

“Uh, he’s normally not that bad when he doesn’t have a few brewskis in ‘em,” Clyde said after a few moments of silence filling the space between them. Henry rolled his lithe shoulders in response and just shook his head.

“At least you and I both picked better things to do than… whatever the hell that was.”

“Yeah, he’s fun to be around but the lightbulbs are loose, you know what I’m sayin’?”

Henry just laughed and shook his head.

“Kinda figured that, no offense.”

“None taken.”

When an uncomfortable stretch of nothingness descended on them again, Henry began to shoot his gaze this way and that. Surely there had to be someone out there right now who’d forgive his looks to show him a good time; alcohol could work wonders, after all, and it was a prime reason he’d wanted to get his hands on Elise early so he wouldn’t be plastered himself enough to make a poor decision. To his disappoint, he hadn’t yet seen Ethel, a totally hot, bubbly blonde who was from the biology department. What he wouldn’t give to have her tutor him with a few private lessons…

“Not that bad of company, am I?” Clyde chuckled, bringing Henry back to the here and now.

“Ah, well, it’s not personal… I just figured with this,” he said and gestured at himself, “that people would be lining up to get a chance to have a go.”

“Mm,” Clyde said with an appreciative nod as he glanced him up and down again. “Yeah, I can see what you mean, at least once they get past the initial shock of it and all. Friendly piece of advice, though, is that you should play it cool.”

“’Play it cool’?” Henry asked skeptically.

“Yeah. You want people to pay attention to you, you need to look like you’re not a total virgin.”

“…Is it really that obvious?” Henry winced.

“Kinda, but a good-lookin’ bod goes a long way for any other faults someone has usually.”

His mouth felt dry. The confidence that Henry had had when he came down into the drag of the main event seemed as if it’d evaporated like spilt water in the Sahara. If someone who was inclined to be friendly could see through his bravado due to Elise’s body, then what did that say about how others were going to look at him? Involuntarily, Henry’s small shoulders slumped forward, and he looked down at his pedicured toes.

“Hey, c’mon. Not the end of the world, Henry. Confidence is just as important.”

Not that he hadn’t heard that before, of course. It was in every self help guide, dating forum, or piece of advice he’d heard from family members and friends before tonight. The more the thought of approaching someone to make moves on them preoccupied his mind, the more Henry was beginning to feel like he should just slink away and masturbate the rest of the party. At least the experience would give him a few stories to tell his friends the following week when classes started.

“Tell you what,” Clyde said, and in only two strides he’d managed to step over to Henry, causing him to crane his neck up once more to look at the towering athlete. “I’ll cut ya deal. I’ll stick with ya until we find someone ya like; long as it takes.”

“In return for… what?” Henry asked with a frown. He’d helped jocks before like Clyde in the past with homework if they needed it, mostly under duress, but he couldn’t think of what else he could possibly offer him. A hand reached down to stroke the stubbly beard on his chin.

“I was thinkin’… you know, me and you. We can find a side room somewhere.”

A blush began to spread across Henry’s face as he took in the offer. Normally, he’d have slapped the hand away and asked him just what the hell was wrong with him, but something was making him pause. Was this something residual? A side effect of having his mind merged with Elise’s body? Clyde was mostly Bruce, so perhaps that helped.

“Ever since I snatched Bruce, it’s been hard lookin’ at you; different now. I don’t know how to explain it.”

“Y-yeah, same,” Henry nodded, his breath hitching in his throat. God, he was becoming a mess.

“Then let’s blow this popsicle stand, babe. We’ll lock the door.”

An electric jolt went up his borrowed spine at the last word and Henry let Clyde’s massive, beefy palm place itself around his shoulders as he was steered towards the door that stood at the opposite end of the room, not even caring if the two of them had attracted any attention.

Something was going to get blown at least, that was for sure.