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Chapter by
Warlog · 29 Sep 2026 -
The day started with Pastries...
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# Chapter Twelve: The Couch
It started on a Tuesday, the way dangerous things do.
Sneha: what are u doing this weekend
Me: Nothing. Why?
Sneha: why is ur answer nothing. why do u have no plans. who raised u
Me: Sneha.
Sneha: ok my parents are going to my mausi's place saturday
Sneha: the whole day
Me: Okay.
Sneha: ok??? thats it???
Me: What are you proposing?
Sneha: 😌 im not proposing anything. im saying information.
Sneha: information like. my house will be empty. all day. and i will be alone in it.
Sneha: wearing things
Me: Sneha.
Me: My parents are out of town Saturday too.
There was a pause. A long one. Long enough that I put the phone down and picked it back up twice.
Sneha: WHAT
Sneha: so ur telling me
Me: I'm telling you my house is empty Saturday. All day. And I will be alone in it.
Sneha: wearing things
Me: Wearing very little, if you come.
Sneha: VICKEY
Sneha: ok. ok ok ok. im going to go lie down
Sneha: on my bed
Sneha: face down
Sneha: for unrelated reasons
Me: Say yes first.
Sneha: obviously yes, u idiot, since the staircase
Sneha: NOON. ill come at noon. and i leave at 6.
Sneha: six hours. boundaries. im a respectable woman.
Me: Six hours is plenty of time to stop being respectable.
Sneha: 😳
Sneha: and im bringing pastries because thats what u bring when u visit someones house for the first time.
Me: You're bringing pastries to a house you're coming to sin in.
Sneha: PASTRIES FIRST. sin second. in that order.
Sneha: i want u to watch me eat one before u do anything to me. thats part of the plan. i want to see u suffer
Me: That's part of your plan?
Sneha: every second is part of the plan beta 😌
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Saturday.
I woke up before my alarm, which never happens, and lay there doing math on my own heart rate. I cleaned the flat like a man expecting a visit from a government inspection. Made the bed three times. Moved the couch. Moved it back. Stood in front of the mirror in four different shirts and texted her photos of two.
Sneha: the blue one. obviously.
Sneha: wait
Sneha: send me the grey too
Me: Sneha.
Sneha: im building a lookbook. also im picturing u in …
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